The Test of Real Friendship

I’m a firm believer that one moment can define a friendship. A true friendship. That moment doesn’t have to be the life changing spectacle some feel it should be. For me, the test of true friendship doesn’t come in the form of big gestures. Let me explain.

I have many acquaintances. Some are closer to me than others, but overall, I keep my personal life at a distance. Growing up, I had ONE best friend. I was fiercely loyal and protective of her. We became closer than sisters, and when we drifted apart it literally closed me off to having that sort of relationship with anyone else. Me and women have always had a harder time getting close. I grew up a tomboy and always felt most comfortable in the presence of men. Until I went and fell in love with my guy best friend. Having a gal pal at that time meant a lot to me.

Not having her around anymore still makes me sad. Too many reasons to number forced us apart but overall, I spent some of my best years with her. Since then, I haven’t bothered to get genuinely close to anyone. I was ok with that. Didn’t even feel like I missed anything, until last night.

A friend of mine, who just completely understands me, solidified her place as my best friend. I mean granted, my husband is my very best friend, but that missing place in my heart, that gal pal, she’s it. How do I know?

We went to bed about 6am last night. We’d been up all night. Laughing. Joking. Telling stupid stories. Sad stories. Sharing pieces of our lives. We knew we had to go to sleep, but we couldn’t bring ourselves to actually do it. Her best friend came along. He’s quickly edging his way up my list of favorite people too. Between the four of us, (the two of them, hubby and I, and my little sister, who spent the night), we in a spur of the moment decision ended up on my queen size bed, laughing, squeezing and just overall having the type of moment you only read about or see on a sitcom. The type of moment you remember for the rest of your life. (Anyone else remember the episode of Friends when Chandler, Monica, Phoebe and Joey ended up trapped in the room and ate Phoebe’s wax to keep from starving because Ross and Rachel were arguing outside? LOL Yea, see what I’m saying?)

I’m exhausted. But I feel so genuinely happy. I’d forgotten how genuinely fun slumber parties could be.


A dirty book is rarely dusty. ~Author Unknown

This one really made me laugh. Because, well, let’s face it. It’s true. 😉

2 responses to “The Test of Real Friendship

  1. ROFL!! OMG, I love that quote! ^_^

    And I hear what you’re saying on the best friend issue…

    I had a best friend at a very young age. We lived in the neighborhood and were inseparable for many years, then in early 1983 my dad got a job far off and we had to move. I thought I’d still get to see her when I visited my grandmother during the summers, but it ended up that not long after I moved, her family moved out of state. It was a very sad and traumatic thing at the time. I felt literally afloat without her. I don’t know how else to explain that. The separation was so sudden, and there we were before we’d even settled down after one move, on different ends of the country. We are still amicable to this day, but with no way to really visit each other (young kids aren’t the most devoted letter writers) the closeness has faded over time. Now we are a bit like kind strangers to one another, although we do still send pics of our kids to each other and spam each other with Xmas cards. It makes me a bit sad to think of it, but there it is.

    On the otherhand, when I moved, I met a new friend. We still get together, still call each other, and now that she’s gained some tech savviness (a new comp, lol) we message each other. The cool thing is we spent so much time together growing up – from 4th grade on – that we ended up as fixtures in each others families. I also happen to be very close to her lil sister, so it seems we are all three sisters – and we refer to each other as such. I love them to pieces, and never hesitate to let them know it.

    I can appreciate what you meant by your post, and I’m glad to hear you’ve found that connection. It is a great feeling. There were about two years where me and my “sisters” lost connection. We were pretty much all getting married around that time, starting families and getting our adult lives together. During that time I missed them both SOOO much. I do cherish the relationships we have now, especially after spending time away. We are closer that ever, even though we may not see each other everyday. 😉

  2. It’s a precious connection. I think it’s rare to find it in too many people, and despite thinking we don’t need it, we really do. I know the feeling Cora, honestly. Glad you have still remained connected! 😀

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